How do you deal with this?
Last weekend I went away with 6 of my friends from school (we have stayed friends for nearly 40 years!!) as we are all 50 this year and thought we should mark the occassion!
One of my closest friends out of them all is a Christian and always has been and we have had lots of discussions over the last 10 years about our different beliefs but have always agreed to disagree and respected each others views.
Well, the night before we all went away I stayed with her and over dinner I was suddenly finding myself having to defend my Reiki beliefs to her and her husband. I really felt as ifI was under some sort of attack, told thatI was going to be judged for what I am doing, how did I know the energy wasn't coming from the devil? I was amazed!She told me that she did not want me doing Reiki to her over the weekend as she did not want to offend her God.
I explained that I never just gave Reiki unless asked for and that she had received it in the past (at her request) and it had made her feel better! She agreed but said she now "knew better". I then asked her did she not think that maybe God had given me this gift and put me in her life so that I could be of help when she needed it?? This she couldn't answer. It then dawned on me that she was worried that we would be sharing a room over the weekend! Laughingly I told her that I did not 'leak' Reiki out in my sleep but she then admitted she had actually asked someone if that could happen!!!!!! Sadly, something changed in our friendship that night and I wondered if anyone else has come up against this with close friends or family members? I expect some suspicion from the general public but not from someone who has known me so long. Apparently my redeeming feature is that I do what I do but with a "good heart".
I have a handout that I give to my students for whenever they get challenged which I took from a website
So I printed off the Q&A section and posted it to her but have not had a response yet! Funnily enough she has quite happily let me show her EFT and we used it over the weekend but only because in her eyes that is more a 'scientific' therapy than using healing energy!
Love and light
reikiangel
xxx
Answers:
Oh dear, this sounds familiar - not for Reiki but for the Church itself (I am a Christian but I no longer go to Church for various reasons which aren't applicable here but which resonate with the black and white thinking of your friend.) I haven't told my parents that I do Reiki either, because they would not be encouraging.
I usually say that Reiki is similar to something that they will accept (like acupuncture, yoga) because often it is misunderstanding such as you found from your friend's questions - plus people think that Reiki is a belief system that goes against Christian teachings.
Other things - scientifically everything has energy from the photon to the sun, we are directing the natural (God given) energy around us for someone's highest good. Second - how do we know that Jesus didn't use Reiki when he healed? Third - if we don't call it healing then is it the same reaction? Church people (which in my opinion differs from being a Christian) might think that healing in this way only comes from God as Spiritual healing and calling on His name, if it's not from God then it must be from the devil (those who are not for us are against us thinking there)
Sounds as if a minister/ priest / vicar has been preaching against Eastern religions/ healing if your friend has suddenly turned against Reiki, and this preaching struck a chord with her about Reiki. EFT isn't an Eastern religion so it is "safe"
This are my opinions after long experience with church people - hope that they might help you
LR
Answers:
Hi,
I know it can be tricky, but healing is about one thing - love. And as Reiki practitioners we need to have love in our hearts. If we judge we can't love and then we can't heal.
Think of the Reiki principles......I will be kind to every living creature. We have no right to judge others. Who are we to put a judgement upon someone else's actions or their thoughts? We must treat others as we wish to be treated.
Did you like your friend before this incident? Did you respect her? Let her have her own thoughts. It is what makes the world a fascinating place. You are each judging the other and that gets in the way of friendship.
And who is to say which one of you is right and which one wrong?
Love and light,
Christina
Answers:
Hi ReikiAngel,
Wow! That's quite an achievement, nurturing those friendships for so many years with all the challenges that life throws at us - definitely worth a celebration! I hope you all had a great weekend.
I have never been in your situation where it is someone who knows me - my friends all either think of me as"woowoo"butsaid in a funny loving way as they know I am always there for them (and it doesn't stop them asking for some "woowoo" help whenthey need it!) or they are already like-minded people who helped me start this spiritualjourney.However, I have encountered this when I worked at the healing centre - some of the Alpha groups in our area are VERY fundamentalist and did like to pop in from time to time to point out the error of our ways!
When faced with this I first decide whether it's worth having the discussion or whether the person is already so close-minded that I might as well save my breath - if the latter I simply say that they are welcome to their beliefs, that I respect them for thatand that I will not judge them for that, and I would appreciate it if they'd extend me the same courtesy.
If I do have the discussion,I usually explain that I don't believe in the devil but I do believe in a loving god who is non-judgemental and will see all that I do and the intentions behind it. I then go on to say that for me, Reiki is all about love, and it is totally unconditional. As far as I am aware the devil, if he exists, doesn't deal in love and doesn't give anything away for free, everything is conditional. Reiki comes with love, with no strings attached, with no requirement to follow a religion or give up your worldly goods. I explain the Reiki principles and ask if these sound like the teachings of the devil. And finally I give them the link to the christianity and Reiki site that you give to your students. And assuming that the conversation has got this far then I leave it there...
In January this year I went to help give a talk to a Rotary Club dinner - not my favourite past-time as they tend to be older, set-in-their-ways men -my heart sank when I realised that the president of the chapter was a christian vicar, and I judged him before even talking to him and expected lots of pointed questioning and disapproving looks. Quite the opposite - he was genuinely interested, he talked of prayer as being one of the oldest forms of healing, then he talked of his missionary work in India, China and various other countries and the different faiths and the wonderful healing modalities he discovered, and how he realised that God brings healing to the world via many different avenues, that his love reaches all in whatever form it needs to take. Also several of the chapter members either were in the complementary medicine field or had benefited from it, so all in all everyone was very receptive with lots of genuine interest - it taught me not to judge another simply because of what I thought they represented!
I don't believe in God as taught in the church (that's why I don't follow organised religion) but I do believe in a divine source and accept that others might call that God, and I do believe that whatever you call this divine source, it is the destination for many people and there are many roads to the same destination, so found the vicar's thoughts resonated quite strongly with my own.
But back to you and your friend. You say that you have had lots of discussions over the last 10 years about your different beliefs but have always agreed to disagree and respected each others views. Presumably something has changed for this to change. If that change is within your friend, there is nothing you can do except continue to extend the hand of friendship and love and let her know without words that you will always accept her as she is. If that change is within you, then maybe you might want to reflect on that change, to make sure that it sits comfortably with you or whether there's something that nee
Answers:
Thank you all for your comments. I may not have explained myself clearly, I am not judging my friend. I was just taken by surprise by what she was saying after all this time. I am still her friend and I will always be there for her (as I have been for nearly 40 years) and of course she is entitled to her beliefs. My question was how do you deal with this sort of reaction when it is someone close to you who knows you inside out?
The difference in our friendship was coming from her not me. We are still in touch and she will be coming to stay with me some time soon which I look forward to. The discussion was not about who is right or wrong and I am fully aware of the Reiki principles and I try to adhere to them every day as most Reiki healers do!
On a previous thread a few years ago I shared the conversation I had about Reiki with the local Vicar which was very enlightening for both of us! I do not judge people by what religion they are as I believe the energy comes under many names to make it as widely acceptable to as many people as possible, something the Vicar and I shared.
Love and light
reikiangel
xxx
Answers:
I'm sorry if you felt I was implying that you were judging your friend - this was not my intention. I was simply sharing my experiences of meeting people who are involved with Christianity, their views, and how I reacted to them and what I had learnt about myself.
I have never had to deal with this reaction from someone who knows me inside out - perhaps because I don't seem to have any really religious friends and they all seem to be quite open-minded.
I'm glad your friendship is still strong enough for her to come and stay with you after such a discussion - some friendships would not have stood that kind of discussion. I guess if I were in your shoes I might find some time during her visit to explain how I felt that evening over dinner, how surprised I was that she should feel that way after all this time, and ask her what has changed to cause that shift. That sounds a bit cold typed up here, but I hope you get the gist!
Must admit I'm still struggling to see how EFT is more scientific and acceptable than Reiki!
With love,
Amber
Answers:
Dear Amber,
You did not imply this but it came across from ChristinaM's post. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I think LavenderRose has probably got it right re the church's suspicion of anything Eastern. My friend's husband asked me if I knew the history of Reiki and launched into telling me it came from BUDDHIST'S shock,horror!
Anyway, thank you for posting and to LavenderRose and ChristinaM.
Love and light
reikiangel
xxx
One of my closest friends out of them all is a Christian and always has been and we have had lots of discussions over the last 10 years about our different beliefs but have always agreed to disagree and respected each others views.
Well, the night before we all went away I stayed with her and over dinner I was suddenly finding myself having to defend my Reiki beliefs to her and her husband. I really felt as ifI was under some sort of attack, told thatI was going to be judged for what I am doing, how did I know the energy wasn't coming from the devil? I was amazed!She told me that she did not want me doing Reiki to her over the weekend as she did not want to offend her God.
I explained that I never just gave Reiki unless asked for and that she had received it in the past (at her request) and it had made her feel better! She agreed but said she now "knew better". I then asked her did she not think that maybe God had given me this gift and put me in her life so that I could be of help when she needed it?? This she couldn't answer. It then dawned on me that she was worried that we would be sharing a room over the weekend! Laughingly I told her that I did not 'leak' Reiki out in my sleep but she then admitted she had actually asked someone if that could happen!!!!!! Sadly, something changed in our friendship that night and I wondered if anyone else has come up against this with close friends or family members? I expect some suspicion from the general public but not from someone who has known me so long. Apparently my redeeming feature is that I do what I do but with a "good heart".
I have a handout that I give to my students for whenever they get challenged which I took from a website
So I printed off the Q&A section and posted it to her but have not had a response yet! Funnily enough she has quite happily let me show her EFT and we used it over the weekend but only because in her eyes that is more a 'scientific' therapy than using healing energy!
Love and light
reikiangel
xxx
Answers:
Oh dear, this sounds familiar - not for Reiki but for the Church itself (I am a Christian but I no longer go to Church for various reasons which aren't applicable here but which resonate with the black and white thinking of your friend.) I haven't told my parents that I do Reiki either, because they would not be encouraging.
I usually say that Reiki is similar to something that they will accept (like acupuncture, yoga) because often it is misunderstanding such as you found from your friend's questions - plus people think that Reiki is a belief system that goes against Christian teachings.
Other things - scientifically everything has energy from the photon to the sun, we are directing the natural (God given) energy around us for someone's highest good. Second - how do we know that Jesus didn't use Reiki when he healed? Third - if we don't call it healing then is it the same reaction? Church people (which in my opinion differs from being a Christian) might think that healing in this way only comes from God as Spiritual healing and calling on His name, if it's not from God then it must be from the devil (those who are not for us are against us thinking there)
Sounds as if a minister/ priest / vicar has been preaching against Eastern religions/ healing if your friend has suddenly turned against Reiki, and this preaching struck a chord with her about Reiki. EFT isn't an Eastern religion so it is "safe"
This are my opinions after long experience with church people - hope that they might help you
LR
Answers:
Hi,
I know it can be tricky, but healing is about one thing - love. And as Reiki practitioners we need to have love in our hearts. If we judge we can't love and then we can't heal.
Think of the Reiki principles......I will be kind to every living creature. We have no right to judge others. Who are we to put a judgement upon someone else's actions or their thoughts? We must treat others as we wish to be treated.
Did you like your friend before this incident? Did you respect her? Let her have her own thoughts. It is what makes the world a fascinating place. You are each judging the other and that gets in the way of friendship.
And who is to say which one of you is right and which one wrong?
Love and light,
Christina
Answers:
Hi ReikiAngel,
Wow! That's quite an achievement, nurturing those friendships for so many years with all the challenges that life throws at us - definitely worth a celebration! I hope you all had a great weekend.
I have never been in your situation where it is someone who knows me - my friends all either think of me as"woowoo"butsaid in a funny loving way as they know I am always there for them (and it doesn't stop them asking for some "woowoo" help whenthey need it!) or they are already like-minded people who helped me start this spiritualjourney.However, I have encountered this when I worked at the healing centre - some of the Alpha groups in our area are VERY fundamentalist and did like to pop in from time to time to point out the error of our ways!
When faced with this I first decide whether it's worth having the discussion or whether the person is already so close-minded that I might as well save my breath - if the latter I simply say that they are welcome to their beliefs, that I respect them for thatand that I will not judge them for that, and I would appreciate it if they'd extend me the same courtesy.
If I do have the discussion,I usually explain that I don't believe in the devil but I do believe in a loving god who is non-judgemental and will see all that I do and the intentions behind it. I then go on to say that for me, Reiki is all about love, and it is totally unconditional. As far as I am aware the devil, if he exists, doesn't deal in love and doesn't give anything away for free, everything is conditional. Reiki comes with love, with no strings attached, with no requirement to follow a religion or give up your worldly goods. I explain the Reiki principles and ask if these sound like the teachings of the devil. And finally I give them the link to the christianity and Reiki site that you give to your students. And assuming that the conversation has got this far then I leave it there...
In January this year I went to help give a talk to a Rotary Club dinner - not my favourite past-time as they tend to be older, set-in-their-ways men -my heart sank when I realised that the president of the chapter was a christian vicar, and I judged him before even talking to him and expected lots of pointed questioning and disapproving looks. Quite the opposite - he was genuinely interested, he talked of prayer as being one of the oldest forms of healing, then he talked of his missionary work in India, China and various other countries and the different faiths and the wonderful healing modalities he discovered, and how he realised that God brings healing to the world via many different avenues, that his love reaches all in whatever form it needs to take. Also several of the chapter members either were in the complementary medicine field or had benefited from it, so all in all everyone was very receptive with lots of genuine interest - it taught me not to judge another simply because of what I thought they represented!
I don't believe in God as taught in the church (that's why I don't follow organised religion) but I do believe in a divine source and accept that others might call that God, and I do believe that whatever you call this divine source, it is the destination for many people and there are many roads to the same destination, so found the vicar's thoughts resonated quite strongly with my own.
But back to you and your friend. You say that you have had lots of discussions over the last 10 years about your different beliefs but have always agreed to disagree and respected each others views. Presumably something has changed for this to change. If that change is within your friend, there is nothing you can do except continue to extend the hand of friendship and love and let her know without words that you will always accept her as she is. If that change is within you, then maybe you might want to reflect on that change, to make sure that it sits comfortably with you or whether there's something that nee
Answers:
Thank you all for your comments. I may not have explained myself clearly, I am not judging my friend. I was just taken by surprise by what she was saying after all this time. I am still her friend and I will always be there for her (as I have been for nearly 40 years) and of course she is entitled to her beliefs. My question was how do you deal with this sort of reaction when it is someone close to you who knows you inside out?
The difference in our friendship was coming from her not me. We are still in touch and she will be coming to stay with me some time soon which I look forward to. The discussion was not about who is right or wrong and I am fully aware of the Reiki principles and I try to adhere to them every day as most Reiki healers do!
On a previous thread a few years ago I shared the conversation I had about Reiki with the local Vicar which was very enlightening for both of us! I do not judge people by what religion they are as I believe the energy comes under many names to make it as widely acceptable to as many people as possible, something the Vicar and I shared.
Love and light
reikiangel
xxx
Answers:
I'm sorry if you felt I was implying that you were judging your friend - this was not my intention. I was simply sharing my experiences of meeting people who are involved with Christianity, their views, and how I reacted to them and what I had learnt about myself.
I have never had to deal with this reaction from someone who knows me inside out - perhaps because I don't seem to have any really religious friends and they all seem to be quite open-minded.
I'm glad your friendship is still strong enough for her to come and stay with you after such a discussion - some friendships would not have stood that kind of discussion. I guess if I were in your shoes I might find some time during her visit to explain how I felt that evening over dinner, how surprised I was that she should feel that way after all this time, and ask her what has changed to cause that shift. That sounds a bit cold typed up here, but I hope you get the gist!
Must admit I'm still struggling to see how EFT is more scientific and acceptable than Reiki!
With love,
Amber
Answers:
Dear Amber,
You did not imply this but it came across from ChristinaM's post. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I think LavenderRose has probably got it right re the church's suspicion of anything Eastern. My friend's husband asked me if I knew the history of Reiki and launched into telling me it came from BUDDHIST'S shock,horror!
Anyway, thank you for posting and to LavenderRose and ChristinaM.
Love and light
reikiangel
xxx