So angry with my dad
Hi. I'm in need of help understanding my feelings today. My dad was taken into A&E last night with a prolonged angina attack. He's ok today but having more tests and xrays. I can't get to see him as we live so far away but speak to my mum regularly. I know I should be worried but I'm so, so angry with him. He's 64, very overweight, smokes all day and takes no exercise. He's been warned countless times about his health but just accepts it as 'his lot'. The rest of my family fuss around him, feeling sorry and upset but I just feel angry that he refuses to help himself.Mum confided in my husband that he spends half their weekly income on cigarettes each week (he's not one to be confronted easily) which has infuriated me even more. We've tried talking to him in the past to no avail. I am very fit and health concious asare my hubby and children, andcan't understand why he continues this way. He's my dad and I love him and so I should be frantic with worry...but I just want to slap his face (sorry). Why am I feeling like this?
Answers:
Because you care honey!:) It is natural to be angry with someone you love when you feel they are putting their health at risk and won't listen to you. Hopefully the hospital staff will be able to succeed where you and others have failed.
Sending Reiki to your Dad to help his recovery, if that's OK. xx
Answers:
Thanks Poppet, I am trying to be understanding...honest, but it feels a bit like[sm=banghead.gif]xx
Answers:
Because yo love him hun & this epiosode ha brought it home to you even more that he's being seemingly quite selfish & skating on thin Ice. All you can really do love is send him love from wehere you are & step back & let him live his life how hefeels he should,Everythng happens as it does for a reason . It's a part of the bigger picture, which sadley we rearly get to see in its entirety.Easy to say when its not your loved one.
My Mum god love her was a 60 a day lady her lungs were a mess but she still smoked right up till , 2 yrs b4 she passed over. It seemed very selfish of her to carry on. Life however wasn't easy for her & smoking was her crutch. Yes we all fussed around her as well but smoking lessened the anxiety just for a few mins, She was hooked on them for many reasons. You have every right to be angry sweetheart, but try to acknowledge this emotion & then let it go.
With love & blessings Maria xxx
Answers:
oh Daisy I feel for you. sometimes the hardest thing we can ever do in life is to stop feeling responsible for another adult - you want your dad to look after himself and to wizen up to the health implications that are a direct result of how he doesn't look after himself.But you can't make him do this, no matter how selfish you may think it is of him to put you and your family through this when there is a healthier option for life. You'll always fight against that brick wall. You may not like the lifestyle he leads, and you'll probably always be opposites in that way. Of course he won't like you lecturing him and i get the impression that you've probably told him time after time how you feel about his lifestyle, but no parent wants to admit that their kids might know better do they?!![/align][/align]So perhaps just try to take a step back and concentrate on loving him and enjoying the time you spend with him while you're both still in this life. [/align][/align]Axx[/align]
Answers:
Because you care honey!:) It is natural to be angry with someone you love when you feel they are putting their health at risk and won't listen to you. Hopefully the hospital staff will be able to succeed where you and others have failed.
Sending Reiki to your Dad to help his recovery, if that's OK. xx
Answers:
Thanks Poppet, I am trying to be understanding...honest, but it feels a bit like[sm=banghead.gif]xx
Answers:
Because yo love him hun & this epiosode ha brought it home to you even more that he's being seemingly quite selfish & skating on thin Ice. All you can really do love is send him love from wehere you are & step back & let him live his life how hefeels he should,Everythng happens as it does for a reason . It's a part of the bigger picture, which sadley we rearly get to see in its entirety.Easy to say when its not your loved one.
My Mum god love her was a 60 a day lady her lungs were a mess but she still smoked right up till , 2 yrs b4 she passed over. It seemed very selfish of her to carry on. Life however wasn't easy for her & smoking was her crutch. Yes we all fussed around her as well but smoking lessened the anxiety just for a few mins, She was hooked on them for many reasons. You have every right to be angry sweetheart, but try to acknowledge this emotion & then let it go.
With love & blessings Maria xxx
Answers:
oh Daisy I feel for you. sometimes the hardest thing we can ever do in life is to stop feeling responsible for another adult - you want your dad to look after himself and to wizen up to the health implications that are a direct result of how he doesn't look after himself.But you can't make him do this, no matter how selfish you may think it is of him to put you and your family through this when there is a healthier option for life. You'll always fight against that brick wall. You may not like the lifestyle he leads, and you'll probably always be opposites in that way. Of course he won't like you lecturing him and i get the impression that you've probably told him time after time how you feel about his lifestyle, but no parent wants to admit that their kids might know better do they?!![/align][/align]So perhaps just try to take a step back and concentrate on loving him and enjoying the time you spend with him while you're both still in this life. [/align][/align]Axx[/align]