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sassy

My 4yo daughter...soon to be 5 is VERY sassy. I will tell her/ask her to do something and she talks back. She always says, "I don't have to listen to you" She makes not so nice comments to people. I did not raise her to be mean. She doesn't listen to me most of the time. I HATE yelling...and if I do, it does not make a difference. I HATE to spank. I got beat with a belt ALOT when I was a kid. I don't think that will solve anything.

I try talking to her, sitting her down and explaining to her why she should be nice and listen and not be rude. She doesn't like being treated like that. I have tried time outs, taking things away for punishment. She always comes back to same ol' sassy mouth girl. Don't get me wrong. She is a sweetie when she wants to be, but....for the most part....I am just so frustrated.

Any suggestions? Help.........
Answers:

My 5 year old was very sassy. My husband and I don't like to yell or spank either, and time outs just didn't seem to work. One Saturday she said something outrageous to my husband and that was it. He went into her room and removed every toy, book, everything besides her bed and her clothes. We explained to her that girls who are mean to their mommy and daddy don't get to play with toys. We told her that when she started saying nice things to us like we do to her then she will earn her stuff back. She was VERY stubborn the first day. She really thought that she was going to get her way! She went to bed very upset that she had nothing to play with. When she got up the next day and realized it was going to be another day of nothing to do her attitude changed.

Now all we have to do is remind her of that weekend and that is usually enough to snap her out of it. I'm not sure if it will work for you, but I thought I would give you my suggestion. Good luck!
Answers:

You poor woman, I can understand where your coming from.My 6 year old was the same way. It hurts being yelled at from a child you love sooooo much! My thoughts are warn her a time out is next (at eye level,stern voice) Next time, straight to time out area!!!(no toys!!! A very empty,boring area)Make her sit for 5 minutes! If she moves,say nothing, and put her right back. She will get tired of fighting it!!! When the time out is complete, make her apoligize to your face, and you (at eye level) tell her what she did to hurt your feelings. Also, start taking privlages away...she will soon see, shes losing all her fun for being sassy!!! Good luck BE STRONG! FOLLOW THROUGH!!!!! CONSISTANCY IS THE KEY!!!
Answers:

I would want to figure out where she learned to talk to people like that. Kids are great mimics, and there must be someone that she spends a significant amount of time with that she is emulating. Just a thought...
Answers:

I agree with lisa. Almost all of what my son says has been copied from either me or my husband. He even tries to keep us in line by telling me or his dad to say please or to be quiet ect.. It is amazing how they copy others. He is almost 3 by the way. It can be as simple as a sibling or maybe the way you and your husband speak to each other. Maybe she sees it in preschool? I think taking away certain privlages is a good idea.

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